I have much to say. That’s nothing new, I usually do, but right now I am experiencing a moment where I want to write but have nothing in particular to say - about anything. Not specifically, at least. Except, of course, where writing is concerned. That is my default… my safety valve. I’ve been told by more than a few writers more experienced than I that we seem to always be able to pull something up about our craft. And I guess that is not surprising as it is a craft I love dearly.
But like love in any manifestation, it can prove to be frustrating as well. Feelings are not easily translated into words and as far as my personal experience is concerned, I find it impossible to completely convey exactly what I feel. I have written about this before. And although my art of expression might be improving, the more I write the more it is revealed how difficult the task of laying down words really is. And that doesn’t even truly convey the frustration I feel right now.
I am a scholar (or rather, training to be) of communication. I study how we exchange ideas between one another. It is not a perfect science nor is it static. Constantly evolving – in real time – communication is always a work in progress. I am learning as much as I can about what brought us to where we are, and in some sense, to predict where we are going. In the process, I am also learning about how to better convey my own ideas to others. It seems as though that, sometimes, the more I know the more daunting the task becomes. By design, I am sure.
Everything exists outside of communication. Everything that was before humans conquered the Earth existed before we attached any kind of label to it. The laws of physics were every bit as valid prior to their discovery as they are now. Long before the first caveman (or woman) took a rock and put it with another rock and named the transaction, one plus one equaled two. The communication conventions we have created over just a relatively short time are remarkable, but in so many instances still inadequate. I can still not entirely capture the nebulous essence of what I feel. And I don’t know that anyone truly can.
And even if possible, the same words, configured in a way that I identify as “it” could mean something entirely different to someone – anyone – else. For the words are but placeholders and what a particular symbol or combination of symbols means relies wholly on one’s personal human experience. Sure, part of that experience is the schooling we receive that defines the communication conventions used in our society, but those definitions are largely influenced by our interaction with the world. And it happens every second of every day.
Although we have been able to accomplish much through our ability to communicate, an ability unique among the animal kingdom, we still deal largely with universals and generalities. Even with highly specific language such as that practiced by governments and lawyers, there is always room for interpretation. And that interpretation also utilizes the imperfect conventions used to create the ambiguity in the first place. Yet the effort to become clearer moves us. The desire to be understood in what we say is as old as our race. It is fascinating to study and... a worthy pursuit.